Passivity

Passive. Everything around the concept screamed weak to me. If you are passive, you just let things happen to you. You don’t stand up for yourself and you act like a door mat. If you are passive, you are not strong. Just the opposite- You are week..or so I believed.

Entering my mid 30’s I was re-evaluating who I was. I was described by my loved ones as opinionated, outspoken, bossy, the leader…all expected descriptions of a first-born Aries. I lived my life aspiring to fulfill these descriptions. I was the strong type and a pusher; the antithesis of passive. I was the aggressor.

Hypothyroidism

Recently diagnosed with Hashimoto’s, I was starting to experience the symptoms. Puffy face, thinning hair, no menstral cycle and frequent fatigue. I didn’t feel strong anymore.

I was becoming the woman I had unfairly judged before. A woman who was letting this disease happen. I used to think you could avoid sickness. If you did the right things, took care of yourself and tried hard enough, you would remain healthy and hot. So why was this happening to me?

I was trying so hard obsessing about my health — trying so hard to avoid certain foods— made sure to work out regularly. Pushing myself past the point of attainment.

I was trying so hard to aggressively attack the disease but I was attacking myself. Just like my thyroid was attacking me. My body was mimicking my mindset.

What helps pave the way towards better health? Is it ggression or passivity?

Trust

When you are insync with the universe and you have true faith that allows you to trust in your higher being (wether its God, Jesus, the universe or ur highest self), you are granted the gift of passivity.

It does not mean that you quit making an effort in life, but instead, you no longer have to push so hard because your higher power does the pushing for you.

You are afforded the opportunity to continue walking without having to preplan the route. Once you trust in something greater than yourself, you are no longer the only on in charge. You can passively trust that your body will make the right decisions. That your instinct will know what to eat and when. That your muscles will tell you when you need to work out and when a good stretching session is going to be of more benefit.

Passivity does not have to be a dirty word. It should not be synonymous with weakness. It takes more strength to passively trust a higher being. To trust that you will be guided to take care of yourself without having to try so hard. Passivity can be pretty. Passivity can be peace.